


Shades of Grey

by dsa_archivist



Category: due South
Genre: M/M, Romance, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2000-06-22
Updated: 2000-06-22
Packaged: 2018-11-10 13:57:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11128281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dsa_archivist/pseuds/dsa_archivist
Summary: Ray and Fraser travel to Chicago to settle Ray's affairs.This story is a sequel toLight and Darkness.





	Shades of Grey

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Speranza, the archivist: this story was once archived at [Due South Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Due_South_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Due South Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/duesoutharchive).

Due South and all of its characters belong to Alliance Communications.

Views to:

A sequel to Light and Darkness. This could turn into another series! Sorry! So I have decided to call the series  **"Love in the Light".**

Dedicated to my friend Ruthie who likes to see Ray and Fraser in love with each other!

SHADES OF GREY

by Callie

**"We find rest in those we love and we provide a resting place in ourselves for those who love us"**

**(Saint Bernard of Clairvaux 1090 -1153)**

 

 

It was late evening, and Sergeant Benton Fraser trudged home through the thick snow. He couldn't help smiling to himself as he made his way towards his house. A glow of happiness warmed him; he was home in Canada. Newly promoted, he had accepted a posting in a small township responsible for an area of a thousand kilometres. His men respected him for his fairness and dedication to his duty, and Fraser loved the vastness and beauty of the territory. But best of all, he was living with a man he loved desperately and wholeheartedly, and who returned his love generously and freely. 

Six months had passed since Lieutenant Harding Welsh had asked him to return to Chicago to visit his partner. Ray had been viciously beaten and permanently blinded in a seemingly senseless attack. Fraser had been shocked to find a pale shadow of the man he had known struggling to come to terms with his disability. Ray had been frightened and frustrated by his blindness, and had been slowly sinking into a black pit of depression isolating himself from a world he couldn't see and the people that loved and cared for him.

Fraser had managed to persuade his partner to come back to Canada with him, and slowly the flame that had been Ray Kowalski ignited lighting up all around him. Thrown together by the tragedy of the attack, they had finally declared their love for each other, and had been living happily together in Fraser's small one storey house ever since. Initially Ray had been surprised when the people of the small township involved him in their daily activities. Their simple acceptance encouraged him, and gradually the slender blonde had become more confident in his abilities. The children in the small school adored him, as evidenced by their small kitchen; the cupboard doors and walls were adorned with pictures the children had made for him. Each one different with a various textures so Ray could feel the pictures with his slender fingers. 

The light from the small living room shone out across the white snow like a beacon. Fraser smiled to himself; Ray always put the light on for him as though he was guiding him home, back to his arms. The warm feeling bubbled up inside him again, and he grinned foolishly as he stamped his boots to remove the snow at the bottom of the steps. Opening the door he quietly stepped inside; he didn't want to disturb Ray as he imagined that he would be in bed by now. Taking off his heavy coat, he hung it neatly on the coat hook placing his stetson on the small table. He peeled off his tunic dimming the lights as he started towards the small kitchen. 

Glancing across the room, he saw his partner and his heart lurched with love for the blonde haired man. Cushions were scattered on the floor, and Ray was fast asleep lying in front of the open fire, his head resting on his outstretched arm. The glow of the fire reflected off his thin face giving his usually pale skin a golden hue. Fraser thought he looked both vulnerable and beautiful at the same time. Kneeling down, he softly kissed his partner's cheek.

Ray stirred. "Ben?" he mumbled opening his pale sightless eyes staring upwards.

"So who else do you know that kisses you?" Fraser teased kissing Ray again and nibbling at his neck.

"Knew it was ya," Ray turned on his back pulling Fraser towards him. "Could smell yer leather," he muttered returning the tender kisses. "And no one kisses like ya do."

"Mmmm," Fraser murmured as he lay down beside his partner drawing the smaller man towards him. Locked in his dark world, touch was important to his partner so Fraser tenderly stroked his fingers through the blonde hair. 

"Missed ya," Ray said kissing Fraser's nose.

"Missed you also," Fraser replied. "I did, however, think you would be in bed. It is rather late."

"Nah. Bed's cold without ya so I thought I'd wait up. Sorta fell asleep," Ray admitted sheepishly.

"I'm sorry I'm late Ray," Fraser apologised. "I had a lot of paperwork to catch up on."

"It's OK. Yer here now," Ray snuggled closer to the Mountie. Do ya want me to get yer something to eat?" he asked.

Fraser smiled. Not wanting to be a burden, Ray had insisted on cooking meals for them both. Fraser had helped him organise the cupboards but Ray, in his usual disorganised chaos, still mixed up the spices and they had eaten many a strange concoction. "Cinnamon casserole?" Fraser couldn't help teasing.

"Oh hardy ha ha," Ray shot him a dirty look. "So I get kinda mixed up sometimes. Can I help it if the pots keep disorganising themselves?" he said defensively.

"Oh Ray," Fraser hugged the small man closer to him. "I love you so much. Never ever change."

"I love you too Ben," Ray murmured against his skin. He ran his slender fingers down the Mountie's body drawing a pleased moan from his partner. "Gonna show ya how much," he breathed as he rubbed his growing arousal against Fraser's thigh.

"Oh God," Fraser moaned as he thrust his hardening erection against Ray's groin.

With practised hands, the partners removed each other's clothing discarding them to one side. Fraser straddled the smaller man, licking and sucking at his neck. Ray moaned under the onslaught, running his hands up and down the Mountie's back. Knowing that Ray couldn't see his movements, Fraser was always careful to gently caress the slender body so as not to startle his partner. Ray captured his partner's lips running his tongue along the bottom lip requesting entry. Fraser opened his mouth, and Ray plunged into the warmness exploring with his tongue. 

Fraser carefully moved his hands up and down the slim body in time with Ray thrusting his tongue in and out of his mouth. They rotated their hips in tandem, grinding their erections together which caused both men to moan at the delicious friction. Ray brought his hands up to Fraser's face, and gently traced a path across the features with his slender fingers. Fraser smiled to himself; he knew that this was Ray's way of seeing him. 

"Love ya Ben," Ray sighed as he ran his fingers down the Mountie's neck and shoulders massaging gently. He pushed his cock upwards wringing a moan out of his partner.

Fraser increased the thrusting, and Ray arched his back off the floor in rhythm with his partner. Crying out each other's names, the partners came together long and hard spurting their semen between their sweat sheened bodies. Fraser flopped forward onto Ray, and both men struggled to control their breathing. Recovering first, Fraser grabbed his discarded shirt and wiped them clean. He pulled Ray into a warm protective embrace. "I love you too Ray," he whispered into his partner's ear.

The fire crackled and blazed in the grate. The sound seemed peaceful and lulled the two men towards sleep, cuddled together amidst the cushions in the light of their love for each other.

**************

Fraser had woken in the night gently lifting his partner into his arms. Ray hadn't stirred, and Fraser had carried him to their bed climbing in beside him, snuggling close. 

It was morning, and Fraser lay on his side watching his partner peacefully sleep. Fraser frowned; his partner's slumber hadn't always been restful. During the first few months, Ray had suffered terrible nightmares of his attack waking in the night screaming for help. Fraser could only hold him close until the smaller man had fallen exhausted back into sleep. 

The nightmares had gradually faded only re-appearing when Ray was upset or over tired. Fraser felt a deep hate for the still unknown attackers who had condemned Ray to live in darkness. Leaning over, he tenderly kissed the beautiful man who bravely coped with his disability every day. Fraser knew that his lover found his blindness frustrating, and it was a never ending battle for the slender blonde to overcome his impatience at his inability to sometimes carry out the simplest of tasks. 

Ray stirred. "Morning Ben," he mumbled sleepily turning into Fraser's embrace. 

"Good morning Ray," Fraser replied with a soft kiss. Fraser took the opportunity to study the pale expressive eyes that stared at him sightlessly. Even unseeing, the blue eyes still betrayed their owner's changeable moods, flashing with amusement and laughter, and at times anger, fear and pain. A sudden urge gripped him, and Fraser hugged Ray closer to his body wanting to shield him from any further hurt and pain.

Ever restless, Ray wriggled out of the embrace stretching his lean body. "Time for breakfast" he said rolling out of their bed.

"You don't have to," Fraser started to say.

"I know, but I wanna," Ray said turning. "Ya shower. I'll start the coffee," he said shrugging into a robe and heading towards the small kitchen.

Fraser sighed getting out of bed. He quickly showered and ambled into the kitchen. Sitting down he watched as Ray assuredly moved about the kitchen preparing their breakfast. They had carefully arranged the furniture in the small house so that Ray could find his way around easily without fear of tripping or falling over. Sometimes when he watched Ray moving confidently around the small house, Fraser couldn't believe that he was blind, imprisoned forever in a world without light. Fraser was startled out of his reverie by his partner moving close to him.

"Here ya go," Ray handed him a mug of steaming liquid. "Yer coffee."

Fraser raised his eye brows, sniffing at the mug. "I quite enjoy hot chocolate for breakfast," he teased as Ray sat down opposite him.

"Oh," Ray said his face falling in disappointment at his mistake. "Them pots must have mixed themselves up again."

"Well I'll just have to have a serious word with them," Fraser laughed grabbing for his lover's hand and squeezing it tightly in reassurance. "And I love hot chocolate."

Ray brightened, grinning at the Mountie. "Toast?" Ray asked getting up moving towards the kitchen counter.

"Are you sure it's toast?" Fraser teased.

"Funny guy," Ray replied putting a plate of toast on the table. "Oh. I nearly forgot. Ilid dropped the mail off last night," he said. "It's on the coffee table," he indicated towards the living room.

Fraser got up to retrieve the mail. Forgetting himself. "Anything interesting?" he bit his bottom lip cursing himself silently as soon as the words were out of his mouth.

"Well. Just let me get my glasses," Ray quipped coming up behind the Mountie putting his arms around his waist resting his chin on Fraser's shoulder.

"Sorry Ray," Fraser apologised. "I just forget sometimes."

"Not yer fault," Ray replied. "I forget too sometimes." He turned his head kissing the back of Fraser's neck. "So is it just bills?"

Fraser sorted through the envelopes. "Yes. And no," he answered. "There's one for you from Chicago." 

"Well open it then," Ray urged grinning.

Fraser quickly ripped the envelope open scanning the contents. The letter was from Lieutenant Welsh informing Ray that he needed to go back to Chicago to settle his affairs and sign papers for his CPD pension and compensation for the attack.

"Oh," Ray slumped onto the couch, his pale eyes staring sightlessly ahead.

"Ray," Fraser frowned and sat down next to his partner. "What's wrong? I can get a week's leave and come with you. It won't be a problem."

"Don't wanna go," Ray whispered. "Can't they send the papers here?"

Fraser scanned the letter again. "I'm afraid not. It all seems fairly straight forward so I am sure that there won't be any problems," he replied. "It would appear that the medical board need to see you before they release your pension and compensation."

Ray jumped up, his eyes blazing with anger. "What so they can tell me what I already know," he cried stepping backwards. "I don't need any..... any medical board to tell me that..... that I can't see. Will never be able to."

"Ray," Fraser stood up moving towards his partner.

"No," Ray took a step back. "They can keep their money," he turned and fell over the coffee table which in his anger he had forgotten was there. He landed hard and Fraser rushed over kneeling by his partner's side.

"Ray," he pulled the slender blonde into a sitting position. He saw the pain and hurt reflected in the unseeing blue eyes. "It isn't just the medical board is it?"

"Oh Ben," Ray murmured as he buried his head into the strong shoulder crying. "Don't wanna go. Don't wanna them to see me like this," he sobbed as Fraser tightened his embrace. "I'm.... I'm afraid."

"Sshhh," Fraser soothed rocking the slender man in his arms. "You don't need to be afraid. I'll be there with you. And we don't have to go anywhere you don't want to," Fraser promised. He knew that Ray didn't want to visit the 27 th precinct having stubbornly refused to have any contact with his friends and colleagues with the exception of Lieutenant Welsh.

Ray pulled out of the embrace looking up at Fraser. "Ya promise," he asked.

"I promise," Fraser reassured. "We'll stay at your old apartment. It will give us a chance to pack up your belongings and arrange for their shipment. And then when you've been to the medical board and signed the necessary paperwork, we'll come home."

Ray thought for a moment. "OK," he agreed reluctantly.

**************

Fraser lay in bed staring up at the ceiling. They had been in Chicago for two days. Upon their arrival, he had called Lieutenant Welsh who had arranged an urgent appointment for Ray with the medical board. Fraser didn't want to stay in the city any longer than was necessary; he knew that Ray was frightened and tense. He glanced over at his partner; Ray was on his side his back to the Mountie. Fraser shifted his position spooning his body protectively around the blonde, his arm slung over the slender waist. Ray murmured in his sleep moving backwards into the warmth. Fraser closed his eyes, waiting for sleep to claim him. He hadn't been asleep long when he awoke with a start; Ray was screaming in his sleep thrashing his arms about. 

"No. Leave me alone," Ray screamed. "Help me."

Fraser sat up quickly taking hold of his partner. "Ray. Wake up. It's a bad dream," he shook his partner firmly. "Ray."

"Ben?" Ray's eyes shot open, panic and terror showing in the paleness.

Fraser hugged the trembling form tightly. "Ssshh. It was just a dream," he lowered his lover onto the bed drawing him close to his body. "I'm here. No-one can hurt you. I'll protect you," he soothed caressing his hand tenderly up and down the pale face. He felt Ray's body relax back into sleep. Fraser frowned; Ray's nightmares had returned with a vengeance. The night before, Ray had woken three times screaming out into the darkness. Fraser kissed Ray's cheek. "I'll protect you my love."

**************

Ray sat slumped on the couch staring ahead miserably. He sipped at his lukewarm coffee. He was alone in the apartment, Fraser having left during the morning to visit Constable Turnbull at the Consulate, and arrange for the shipping agent to collect the packing cases that now littered the tiny apartment. He had always considered Chicago to be his home, but since the attack he had been afraid of the large sprawling city with its loud noises and busy sounds. He wanted to go home back to the small township where he felt safe and secure. Despite Fraser's love, Ray couldn't help feeling lonely and isolated in his dark world. He craved to see the light again, and his heart ached knowing that he would never see a sunrise or sunset again. But above all, he desperately wanted to see Fraser's face again. He loved the Mountie with all of his heart, and in his mind's eye he could imagine the beautiful face with inky blue eyes, framed by dark hair. He wiped at the tears that threatened, and he jumped up restlessly moved around the living room, his legs knocking against packing cases as he paced.

Grabbing his jacket and his hated white stick, he headed towards the apartment door. "I'll go and meet him from the Consulate," he thought to himself as he shut the door behind him. He made it out of the apartment building without mishap. Standing on the top of the steps, he closed his eyes as he pictured the route to the Consulate. "I can do this. I can do this," he repeated to himself as he slowly made his way down the steps. He turned right ambling slowly along the street moving his stick left and right in front of him as he walked. 

After an hour, he decided that it hadn't been such a good idea admitting to himself that he was hopelessly lost. Some teenagers on roller blades had jostled him, and he thought he had turned himself around. His heart pounded, his mouth was dry and he was afraid. "Ben," he whispered to himself. The sounds of the city seemed alien to him, and his heightened hearing made them seem louder than usual. He managed to keep away from the road, recoiling at the sounds of the cars and the occasional blast of a horn and the cries of irritated drivers shouting at pedestrians as they tried to cross the street. 

Ray found the jumble of sounds disorientating making his head spin. It filled him with a fear that threatened to choke him. He could hear the voices of the people, could feel when they were close to him, their scents assailing his senses. They hurried by muttering an apology as they knocked into him. Shaking his head, he tried to shut out the sounds.

"Get outta the way ya stupid jerk," a loud voice shouted at him and Ray shrunk back in terror. Large hands pushed him to one side roughly. Dropping his white stick, Ray's back hit something solid, and he stood frozen hugging the wall wishing desperately that Fraser was there. Trying to keep calm and taking a deep breath, Ray started to feel his way along the wall, tears stinging at his eyes. He brushed at them with the sleeve of his jacket. 

"Are you lost young man?" a voice said in front of him. Startled he shook his head edging away from the stranger. Ray shrunk away from the voice fumbling his way along the wall with one hand. "Let me help you," the voice said. Ray felt someone touch his arm, and he flinched in fear. 

Ray shook his head again inching away from the voice slowly. He broke into a run groping his way along the wall; he could hear the voice still shouting at him. In his panic he stumbled as he turned into an alleyway. Regaining his balance, he walked quickly down the alleyway his right arm outstretched in front of him. He yelped in pain as he collided with a rubbish dumpster. Defeated, frightened and lost Ray slid down the metal container. Drawing up his knees, he wrapped his arms tightly around his legs, resting his head. "Ben," he sobbed. "Help me." 

**************

Fraser opened the apartment door. "Ray," he called as he shrugged off his coat hanging it on the coat hook. "Ray," he repeated. Silence. Heart racing, Fraser quickly searched the apartment; Ray was no-where to be found. "Ray. Where are you?" he thought desperately. Pulling on his coat, he was just about to leave the apartment to search for his lover when the telephone rang. Picking up the receiver. "Sergeant Benton Fraser," he said as he listened to the voice on the other end. He sighed in relief. "Yes. Thank goodness. Yes. I'll be right over. Thank you kindly Lieutenant Welsh." 

Hanging up the telephone, Fraser ran out of the apartment building and hailed a cab.

**************

The cab journey seemed to take forever; Fraser stared out of the window willing the driver to go faster. Paying the cab driver, Fraser ran into the 27 th precinct. The lieutenant met him on the stairs. "Where is he?" Fraser asked. "Is he alright? Is he hurt?"

Lieutenant Welsh put up his hand in an effort to stop Fraser's babbling. "Calm down Sergeant. He's fine. Just gave himself a bit of a scare. A patrolman found him huddled in an alleyway. Recognised him and brought him here," he answered. "Miss Vecchio, Huey and Dewey are with him in the break room although it don't seem to be helping." The lieutenant regarded the Mountie. "I think he needs you," he grinned as Fraser blushed bright red.

Fraser followed the lieutenant towards the break room. Looking through the door, he saw Ray sitting on a chair his arms wrapped around his slender body. He was trembling uncontrollably resisting Francesca's attempts at comforting him flinching at her every touch. Huey, Dewey and a few other officers were standing nearby staring at the ex-detective as though he was the main attraction in a zoo. Fraser heard the lieutenant cursing silently under his breath.

Until this moment, Fraser hadn't realised how isolated Ray's world was. He was in a place he should feel secure in, had worked in for over a year, but his lover was obviously in distress, the slender body trembling with fear. Fraser quickly stepped into the room pushing his way through the crowd of police officers.

Fraser couldn't help a small smile as Ray seemed to sense his presence, his head jerking towards him. "Ben?" he whimpered. 

Fraser's sharp hearing caught Dewey asking his partner how Ray knew it was the Mountie. He ignored the comment kneeling in front of his partner taking his hands and squeezing them in comfort. "Yes Ray. It's me."

"Hiya Frase," Francesca said smiling down seductively at the Mountie.

Fraser looked up. "Francesca," he nodded coolly.

"Men can be such babies sometimes," she pointed at Ray. "The idiot wouldn't let me touch him."

"Ray is not an idiot," Fraser glared at the small woman, making her step back in astonishment at the expression on his face. "And I'm not surprised he wouldn't let you touch him with all of you staring at him like he was some kind of exhibit," he snapped.

"But..," Francesca stammered.

Fraser scowled again and she stopped mid-sentence. "He may not be able to see you, but he can sense you all. Did anyone talk to him like he was a normal person?" 

He thought he heard Huey mutter that they didn't know what to say. Fraser glared angrily at the group. "I thought as much," he turned his back on them carefully embracing the smaller man. He gently caressed Ray's face with the back of his hand. "Are you alright?" Fraser asked concern apparent in his voice. 

"Am now," Ray whispered leaning into the embrace, his trembling beginning to subside.

"Right everybody out," Welsh commanded opening the door. "Now." The officers filed past their commanding officer, some looking guiltily down at the floor. "Now Miss Vecchio," Welsh said firmly as Francesca hesitated. He grabbed her arm dragging her out of the room leaving the partners alone.

Fraser cast a grateful smile at the older man. He turned his attention back to Ray. "What did you think you were doing?" Fraser lightly scolded still caressing the pale face reassuringly.

"Thought I'd come and meet ya. Like I do sometimes at home," Ray said softly. "But the..... the noise kinda confused me. And I sorta lost.... lost my bearings."

"Oh Ray," Fraser sighed. 

"The noise was so.... so loud, and it kinda scared me," Ray murmured. "I used to know this city, but I didn't know where I was." He shivered and Fraser tightened his hold. "I wanna go home Ben," Ray pleaded. "I don't belong here any more. Please."

Fraser kissed the top of Ray's head. "We can go home on Saturday."

"We can?" Ray said looking up hopefully. The expression turned into a frown. "But the medical....," he started to say.

Fraser hushed him. "I spoke with Lieutenant Welsh earlier today. He has arranged for you to sign the paperwork without seeing the medical board. I understand he argued your case producing your medical records which seemed to satisfy them," he explained. "The papers are back at your apartment ready for you to sign."

"Oh," Ray murmured dropping his head guiltily. "Sorry Ben."

Fraser tilted Ray's head upwards stroking the pale face. "It's alright. You're safe. That's all that's important," Fraser pulled the blonde to his feet. "Now let's get back to the apartment and finish packing," he said. "Then we can go home." Ray smiled weakly and nodded; he clutched at the Mountie's arm in comfort. 

Lieutenant Welsh watched at Fraser led his partner down the corridor. Kowalski held onto the Mountie's arm tightly. Fraser was softly murmuring to the slender man as they walked. They seemed lost in their own world and the lieutenant smiled to himself as he remembered something that his mother had told him just before he had married. "Son, everyone in love is unique, and every pair of lovers creates a singular world for themselves. Yet all lovers share a common purpose, the courage to be in love," he thought to himself. He turned to walk back towards his office. "Wise words Mom," he grinned but it seemed to describe Fraser and Kowalski and he knew, as he had known six months ago, that the two men would take care of each other.

**************

When the partners had gotten back to the apartment, Fraser had ordered pizza for their supper. They sat amongst the packing cases eating in companionable silence, Fraser lightly holding Ray's hand. Fraser disappeared into the kitchen to make a drink and clear away the dishes. When he returned, his partner was standing at the window staring across the city. He moved over wrapping his arms around Ray's upper body. He lightly kissed Ray's shoulder as the blonde leaned back into the embrace bringing his hands up to rest on Fraser's arms.

"Tell me what it looks like Ben," he said quietly. "Is it a pretty night?"

Fraser stared across the city. "Yes Ray. It is," he replied pulling Ray closer to him.

Ray twisted in the embrace looking up at Fraser's face. "Paint me a picture," he pleaded. "So I can see it too. Please."

"Very well," Fraser kissed the top of Ray's head noticing that the blonde had closed his eyes. He took a deep breath. "The night is very clear. The dark blueblack sky has no clouds. But you can see the occasional flashing red light as an aircraft passes across the city sky," he paused looking down lovingly at the man in his arms. "Can you see it Ray?"

"Mmmm. Go on Ben," Ray encouraged not opening his eyes.

"The lights of the city are twinkling like beacons rising up into the sky, competing with one another each trying to be the brightest light. Orange, red and yellow neon lights blink inviting the people of Chicago to eat pizza and fast food," Fraser beamed as Ray chuckled. "But the stars are sparkling and shimmering high above the tall city buildings easily winning the brightest light contest," Fraser finished smiling.

"That's beautiful Ben," Ray murmured turning in the Mountie's embrace. "Yer good at painting," he reached up kissing Fraser softly. The Mountie returned the kiss. Releasing his lover. "Could ya find me a CD? I wanna play it to ya," Ray said. "I think it's the fourth one down on the left."

Fraser kissed Ray's nose. "Of course. Describe the cover," Fraser said kneeling down in front of the CD rack. He selected the CD as instructed and placed it in the player suppressing his surprise at how organised the CDs seemed to be.

Ray held his hands out towards the Mountie. "Dance with me?" he asked shyly. Fraser beamed as he got to his feet; it was the first time since the attack that Ray had shown any interest in dancing.

"It would be my pleasure Ray," Fraser smiled taking the smaller man into his arms pulling him close. Reaching over, he hit the play button. A sweet melody filled the tiny apartment which the Mountie vaguely recognised; Fraser was surprised when Ray started to softly sing as he began to waltz the Mountie around the living room.

**Have I told you lately that I love you?**

**Have I told you there's no one above you**

**You fill my heart with gladness**

**Take away my sadness**

**Ease my troubles that's what you do**

**There's a love that's divine**

**And it's yours and it's mine**

**Like the sun**

**At the end of the day**

**We should give thanks and pray**

**To the one**

**To the one** ****

Despite his blindness, Ray didn't stumble, but gracefully danced them backwards and forwards. Fraser followed his every move, letting the smaller man take the lead. They fit together perfectly as though they belonged together. Fraser joined Ray in singing the last verse. 

**Oh the morning sun in all its glory**

**Greets the day with hope and comfort too**

**You fill my life with laughter**

**You can make it better**

**Ease my troubles that's what you do**

**Have I told you lately that I love you?**

**(Morrison - 1998)**

The track ended and Ray stopped dancing; the partners remained in the embrace, content to hold each other, caressing gently with their hands. Ray reached up towards Fraser's face stroking gently with his slender fingers. He turned his pale eyes upwards to look at the Mountie. "Wish I could see ya," he said quietly. "Yer so beautiful."

Fraser took hold of the hand that was caressing his face, lightly kissing the fingers one by one. "But you do see me," he murmured laughing lightly at the look of confusion on Ray' face. Fraser tapped his partner's chest. "You see me with your heart." 

Ray tilted his head downwards flushing slightly. "Ben," he protested shyly.

"Ray," Fraser sighed slightly. "You have shown me more love than I have ever known in my life. I don't care that you can't see me," he raised Ray's head so he was staring directly into the sightless eyes. "I love you. And I will love you forever."

Ray seemed to consider the words for a moment, then smiled back. "I love you too Ben. Very much," he murmured as he claimed Fraser's lips in a passionate kiss. "Make love to me Ben."

Fraser whispered in his partner's ear before lifting Ray into his arms. Walking to the bedroom, Fraser lay him gently on the bed. Ray pulled Fraser down on top of him. "Love ya Ben," he sighed as he thrust his growing arousal into the Mountie's groin. Fraser moaned gyrating his hips causing the slender detective to squeak in pleasure as he felt Fraser's erection through his jeans.

Caressing and stroking, the partners removed each other's clothes throwing them untidily onto the floor. They lay side by side gliding their naked bodies against each other groaning with delight and ecstasy at the friction. Ray ran his hands up and down Fraser's arms feeling the strength in the muscles. Fraser licked down Ray's face towards his shoulder. He bit lightly marking the pale skin. As Ray caressed his back, Fraser traced a path down the slender body towards Ray's nipples. Ray gasped as Fraser sucked on each nipple twirling his tongue around each one in turn. Fraser worked his way up the slender body claiming his partner's lips hungrily, thrusting his tongue in and out of the warm mouth.

"Need ya Ben," Ray murmured as he slipped a hand between their bodies grasping Fraser's cock running his hand up and down the hardness. "Need to feel ya inside me," he breathed as Fraser whimpered in rapture at the gentle touch. The Mountie flipped the smaller man onto his back, straddling him. Grabbing a pillow, he positioned it under Ray's hips. Fraser took possession of Ray's lips sucking on the bottom lip requesting entry. Ray opened his mouth, and the partner's tongues duelled and sucked on each other. Moans of passion and love filled the small room as the men explored each other with tongues and hands gently caressing.

"Take me now Ben," Ray whispered spreading his legs drawing his knees up to his chest. "Want ya inside me."

Fraser groaned in pleasure at the request settling himself between Ray's spread legs.

He wet his fingers thoroughly; leaning forward he whispered into Ray's ear. Ray smiled as Fraser gently inserted one finger into his lover's body. Ray arched his back off the bed. "Oh God Ben."

Encouraged by his lover's reaction, Fraser carefully inserted a second and third finger pushing them slowly in and out of the slender body. Ray was moaning in ecstasy his eyes closed. He ran his hands up and down Fraser's back and firm ass.

"Love ya Ben," he chanted. 

"Love you too Ray," Fraser leaned forward capturing Ray's lips in a passionate but gentle kiss. He removed his fingers from Ray's body and tenderly fondled his balls, running his fingers up and down his partner's erection. "Are you ready?" Fraser asked as he shifted slightly bringing his cock dripping with pre-cum to Ray's opening.

"Oh God. Yes," Ray squirmed under Fraser's body. "Take me now."

Fraser smiled and pushed his cock forwards slowly into his lover's body. Ray let out a wail of ecstasy and propelled his hips upwards to meet the Mountie. Fraser grunted with desire plunging his penis deep into his lover's body with one smooth thrust. "You feel so good," Fraser sighed as he began to move his cock up and down in the smooth channel. He leant forward kissing Ray tenderly as he pressed his cock further into the small body.

"So do ya," Ray cried as Fraser's penis hit his prostate. He gripped his own cock stroking up and down. Fraser wrapped his larger hand around Ray's slender one, moving in tandem with him as they both caressed Ray's erection setting up a delicious rhythm which wrung moans from each man. Ray arched his back off the bed as he shot his sperm over their hands and between their bodies. He cried out Fraser's name as his orgasm overtook him. Ray sunk back onto the bed breathless. As Fraser felt Ray tighten around his cock he plunged deeper into his lover's body. As Fraser thrust into him Ray lifted his hands to the Mountie's face tenderly tracing his slender fingers over the Mountie's features, seeing him with touch. Breathing hard, Fraser thrust in and out of the tight channel furiously. Fraser felt his balls tighten, and he squeezed his eyes shut as he rammed his cock deep into Ray's body. His orgasm came long and hard as he released his semen deep within the waiting body crying out Ray's name over and over.

Panting Fraser slumped forwards managing to balance himself on his elbows above his lover's body. Ray continued to caress his face lightly with the back of his hands as Fraser struggled to control his breathing. Fraser rolled onto his side carefully removing his softening cock from his lover's body. Ray turned onto his side moving close to the warm body. Fraser automatically wrapped his arms around the slender blonde protectively. They lay in contented in each other's arms luxuriating in the afterglow of their love making.

"Thank you," Ray murmured against the soft skin.

Fraser shifted in the embrace looking at the blonde. "For what?" he asked.

"For being here. For being you," Ray replied nuzzling Fraser's neck lovingly. "For being my eyes. For painting me pictures. And for loving me even though I'm damaged goods."

"Oh Ray," Fraser sighed in exasperation. "You are not damaged goods. You are my perfect beautiful Ray," he pulled the smaller man closer to him. "I'm damaged too."

"Nah ya aint," Ray protested. "Yer perfect."

Fraser sighed silently knowing that he wouldn't win this argument. One day he would convince his lover that he was beautiful. "Saint Bernard of Clairvaux," he started to say.

"Who?" Ray interrupted wriggling in the embrace. "And what's he got to do with us?"

"Ray," Fraser said exasperated. "If you would just listen, and stop wriggling. I'll tell you." Fraser leant down to kiss the blonde head. 

"Knock yerself out," Ray teased returning the kiss. "I'm all ears."

"Saint Bernard was a French ecclesiastic who lived in the tenth century," Fraser enlightened his partner.

Ray couldn't help himself. "Wow go figure."

"Ray," Fraser put his fingers over his lover's lips to keep him quiet. "He said that we find rest in those we love, and we provide a resting place in ourselves for those who love us."

"Mmmm. That sounds nice Ben," Ray murmured sleepily. "I still don't follow."

"Well what I am trying to say between your interruptions and fidgeting," he smiled fondly down at his lover. "Is that's how I feel about us. We found each other, and we provide each other with a resting place for our love," Fraser explained. 

"I get it now. Sounds kinda right," Ray muttered. "Finding peace with each other. I like that. I can do that."

"And it doesn't matter how damaged we both are. It's our love for each other that counts," Fraser continued. "You are my light Ray. And I love you."

"I love you Ben," Ray his head staring sightlessly at the Mountie. "It's dark in my world, but when I'm with ya, I can see the light," he lifted his hand to Fraser's face feeling the Mountie smile broadly. 

The two men cuddled together as the lights of the city dimmed into night. A beam of light from a streetlight shone through the crack in the curtain bathing the lovers in a golden hue as sleep claimed them.

THE END

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